We Are Family!!!!

We Are Family!!!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_Oiu9jW-VyE

Yesterday was my first Chemo treatment! Wowee that was a loooong day. My mom flew in on Sunday to Thursday to be with me for the first round. We had to be at the hospital for 8am. It's so daunting. They open the chemo doors - the doors to this entirely different surreal world. Everyone rushes in to line up and as you stand there in that line up you just feel like you are walking into the valley of death. Must sound so morbid and yucky but its really the truth - for me anyways. (and I promised to express my real emotions in this blog so people would gain some insight and for those also going through this and know there feelings are normal.) I'm so glad my mom was with me yesterday - she was a real trooper. My family has stood behind me big time. The picture today is of my family from when we were little. (thanks to Caryn for sending me this old skool pic). You can save your laughs and comments about my hair cut for later..haha.. From left to right is: My oldest bro Jim (he's since learned how to smile, my momma, my 'lil bro Bear in the middle, then me (all smiles) pappa bear and then my older bro Mikey (who also has learned to smile since.) I grew up in a house of boys - its really a wonder I grew into a lady at all. I was a total tomboy growing up but maybe it made me a little tougher now for this battle.

There are a lot of little steps the first day of chemo. You have to register at the front reception, then go register at the chemo centre, then they weigh you (yahooo my fav part) and send you back to the waiting room to watch this lovely video on chemo. (I could barely watch it to be honest) Then you pick up your anti-nausea pill at the pharmacy and do some more waiting until finally the nice chemo nurse comes to get you set up. (yipee finally my turn - this is about the time when I almost turned around and bolted out the door.) But I didn't - mom and me marched right into the room with our tour guide (that's what Nurse Nancy called herself - I was kinda hoping for Nurse Jackie but she didn't show). They took me into a room with 5 beds and plunked me down next to a guy who was also doing the R-CHOP chemo (he was on round 5 so he was a bit of a pro and made me feel better.) Unfortunately as lovely as my nurse was she couldn't get the IV in - um can you say OUCH. She tried and tried and tried and finally went and got this other nurse who got it the first shot. So there I was all set up, before they start the chemo drugs you have to take 2 Tylenol, 2 Prednisone, and three of this tiny other steroid drugs - then they start you on the Benedryl drip and then your first chemo drug. It's nuts. For the rest of the day it went pretty smoothly. I slept on/off, had a few snacks, drank some water/juice and that was about it. I had one momentary allergic reaction to one of the drugs so they had to stop it, give me more Benedryl and some other drug and then start it up again. Wowzaaa.

At the end of the day we packed up (8.5 hrs later) and headed home. I was feeling not to bad and then BAM around 8pm I fell violently ill. I was so sick I could barely make it to the bathroom. All I wanted to do was throw up but I couldn't even do that. (Eventually I did which sucked as well) I was so sick for 4 or 5 hours. Mom gave me some natural stuff to help with my stomach which actually helped tremendously then she rubbed my feet with oils. Finally I was able to fall asleep. It's a choppy sleep though b/c of the Prednisone. Google it - its a gross drug. You feel like your on crack or something. This nervous energy just pulsates through your body and your hungry but nausea's .. mmm great combo.

So here we are today - I'm feeling a bit better and still managing to stay in good spirits despite it all. In fact mom and I had a giggling it at the hospital yesterday (probably due to be very overtired and all the drugs they gave me to help) and the nurse just smiled at us and said 'you guys aren't supposed to be having this much fun' ... hey whatever gets you thru this right? She later sat with us and talked for awhile and said not to push myself this week or at all during chemo and take care of me b/c I'll have a much quicker recover. Good advice and I totally agree.

Thanks everyone for all your messages yesterday it really gave me that extra strength to get through my first round and the coming weeks. I'm feeling a little bit better today so that's good to...other then the fact I'm typing at mock speed due to the Prednisone. haha .. YIKES.

B's xx